Just like last year, The Phlegm Fatales—in all their strange, sultry, and wonderfully weird glory—graced Fogfest 2023 with their presence. This time it wasn’t so much a scripted show as it was a lip-sync extravaganza (work, bitch!) with songs and performances inspired by the creepy, the crazy, and the horrific. Each member of The Phlegms took to the stage for a few numbers, apart from /garbagefile (a.k.a Kai Bryan), who spent the day protesting in the name of Palestinians as they, and others, put pressure on local politicians to call for a ceasefire in Gaza. Kai started the show off with not only a land acknowledgement that paid respects to the Indigenous peoples who were here before European settlers colonised the land we now call Newfoundland & Labrador, but likewise with a recognition of the colonial violence happening to Palestinians in Gaza.

In this day and age of renewed hatred against queer and trans people, The Phlegm Fatales merely existing is a political statement. The fact they took the time to acknowledge current terrible events while paralleling the colonial destruction historically here at home and what’s currently happening abroad shows why The Phlegms are true artists; very, very important ones, at that. And when the world feels at its most bleak, you really do want to find yourself sitting in a packed house somewhere like The Majestic in St. John’s taking in a show like The Phlegm Fatales’ Fright-Day the Thirteenth (on the Seventeenth).

All photographs taken by Christopher Deacon

There was so much to enjoy during The Phlegms’ performances.

There were perfect introductions (“Ladies and gentlest of thems“). Irma Gerd had the bisexuals living with a yellow stash-yellow hair-natural chest hair combo. Madame Daddy’s first number, featuring a dummy, ended with Daddy on top of their inanimate partner screaming: “I‘m married!” At one point, Daddy corrected someone who shouted out “Yes, girl!” by nicely letting them know “Not a girl, but thanks!” followed by a return a bit later of “Yes, they/them!” Liezel Hues did a great lip sync to “Where Did You Sleep Last Night?” by Sleigh Bells while donning deliciously “fashionable flesh.” Daddy came back later and channelled Pearl. Liezel also gave us another number including a quote from The Princess Bride (“Rodents of unusual size? I don‘t think they exist!”) which began their wrestling match to the death with a giant stuffed rodent onstage.

Eda Kumquat brought Harley Quinn-esque vibes verging on crazy and sensual before making a psychotic, creepy exit from the stage that was perfectly unhinged. Better yet, Eda returned soon after for a mashup of “The Cuppycake Song” and some death metal; cupcakes were NEVER so delicious and messy as this! They ended their cupcake-eating thrash performance by revealing a ‘Fuck TERFS’ shirt beneath their stained garment; dare I say, the icing on the cupcake? (Okay, okay, please stop throwing rotten vegetables at me.) Perhaps best of all was when Madame Daddy asked what the new cupcake dish was called and Eda simply replied “Eda‘s cumcakes.” /garbagefile did turn up at the end of Eda’s number—it wasn’t for a performance, it was to do a little quick submissive cleaning of the cupcake remnants off the floor with their tongue before being banished behind the curtain by Daddy. There was even a dash of Vincent Price courtesy of Irma Gerd, who lip-synced the intro Price did for “The Black Widow” before launching into a number (“I Wanna Bite Ya” by Planningtorock) complete with mock cannibalism and a bit of light choke play featuring a willing audience member.

The Phlegm Fatales are always worth the price of admission, no matter what form their shows take. You will most definitely leave the venue afterwards having seen something you’ve never seen before. Fright-Day the Thirteenth (on the Seventeenth) was a welcomed part of Fogfest and, really, The Phlegms are a staple of the event at this point in the festival’s short but fantastic, horrifying life.
We laughed, we lived, we dry-heaved, we saw some nipple; what more could you ask for?